I have been in a total job related funk as of late. I feel like I am old enough (24) that I should be on some sort of career path/have some idea of the career path I want to be on.
But, not so much.
Ok. A brief history. I was a political science major in college. At the time I thought I wanted to work in politics (I grew up in DC, so politics seemed much more exciting to me than they do to most people). But after working on a few campaigns, I basically became disillusioned. So scratch that.
Then I took a year off from college (but did not, in fact, drop out, as my parents constantly told all of their friends). I worked at a non-profit doing event planning. I totally loved it and decided that after graduation I would do event or wedding planning.
Surprisingly (if you use that word to mean totally not surprisingly) that didn�t work out. After graduation I ended up moving to Lexington, KY to live with K. So I was in an area where I had no contacts and where there were very few event planners. Oh yes, and we were in the middle of a recession.
On to career path number three for me. I started teaching preschool. And I really liked it. And I was actually really good at it. I did that for about six months and then spent the next year working as a substitute teacher for the public schools (a job that is potentially one of Dante�s circles of hell, but that�s a story for another time).
So, I was all set on teaching and once we moved to California I was going to go to graduate school and get my teaching credential. But not so fast there, young lady (that would be fate speaking to me, of course). When we got here California was having a huge budget problems and one of the things the California State schools cancelled was graduate programs beginning in the spring. And it doesn�t look like we�re going to be here long enough before K gets transferred for me to start a program in the fall.
So, hmmmm�
After applying for approximately a million jobs I ended up working as an alumni coordinator here. Which I really, really hate (ahhh�back to the point of this entry). It is so very very boring. The office is always freezing cold (seriously, there is a thermostat in my office which currently reads 55�that�s too damn cold). And the people inexplicably hate me. They wouldn�t really speak to me when I first started and hostility on both sides has just sort of escalated. I am officially the office pariah. I have never had a job where I was hated before. It pretty much sucks.
I have been trying to at least figure out what I want to do with my life and I have narrowed it down to teacher, social worker, or counselor. The question is how to get to any of these careers in a timely fashion. Eventually I am going to want to have kids and stop working and at this point I am going to be in my chosen career for a month before that happens.
I don�t know. When I was doing that theta reading with SG she told me to articulate my ideal working situation so I could manifest it. All I could come up with is that ideally I wouldn�t have to work. And I feel guilty about saying that because I feel like it makes me seem like someone who is lazy and is wasting all of her abilities. This perhaps come from my parents who are fond of saying things like �But you�re so smart, we always thought you�d be a doctor or a lawyer� and then looking at me with disappointment. But, yes, ideally I would mainly stay at home. Maybe teach preschool a few days a week or volunteer. And then in a couple of year have kids (if K is reading this he�s probably having a heart attack. Calm down, I am planning on waiting more that a couple of years).
I just don�t see this manifesting. But I try to be hopeful.
We shall see how this all works out. I am thinking that in the new year I will start looking around for some other jobs. Maybe the perfect thing will drop in my lap. Or maybe we�ll win the lottery.
Reading: Bridget Jones' Diary for the millionth time. I needed a book comfort blanket.
Craving: A whole day to spend in beb with a big pile of books.
Thinking: That I really need to perk up. And start wearing gloves to work.
Student teaching begins - 2005-02-20
Three more days!! - 2005-02-07
Weekend recap - 2005-01-31
Oh the hate - 2005-01-26
Yay for staying home! - 2005-01-24