just-married...musings of a new bride...
just-married...musings of a new bride...
just-married...musings of a new bride...
just-married...musings of a new bride...

Bad ex-boyfriends and a kick ass fiance

2003-12-10 | 2:46 p.m.
Past loves.

For those who are keeping track (which according to my stat tracker is virtually no one) my sunglasses have been returned. Thank you little poltergeists. And when you finish with Betsyís Wedding, I would love to get it back as well. Or at least find out how it ends.

So I have been pondering past loves today. Mainly because I am SO excited about getting married in just a couple of weeks and feeling very, very in love with my husband to be. And very grateful that I found him, because I have waded through the dating pool, and although there are a few gems (like the lovely K) to be found, all in all itís just not pretty.

Some highlights (or lowlights as the case most definitely is). There was HFH who I dated most of my sophomore and senior years in high school. He drank vodka out of a water bottle in class, sold drugs, and used his fake ID to buy alcohol for middle schoolers. There was Gnat who said he was falling in love with me in college and then when I returned from a weekend trip broke up with me because his friends didnít like me. He also called me a slut because I had fooled around with (mainly kissing) like four guys during my freshman year in college while he remained pristine. Small-headed David adored me in that spineless kind of way. My whole relationship with him had an eerie single white female vibe. I would mention a CD in passing and the next day he would be listening to it in his car, etc. I canít mock him too much, though, because he overlapped a bit with young K (I am not a great breaker-upper). Poor guy. He never had a chance after I met K. The king of assholes, of course, was ECB. He spent the first half of our relationship pressuring me into sex, and then was awful and inconsiderate in bed and told me he didnít respect me as much for giving in. I also think he cheated on me. Plus every time we ordered pizza he would get it with pepperoni and never once remembered that I donít eat pork.

And these are just the guys whose bad things are small enough that I can joke about them. Thereís a whole bunch who werenít even human enough to make it into that category.

The point of this rant, other than to perhaps hurry a little karma their way, is that even though these guys all had good qualities too (with the possible exception of ECB) in their very best moments not one of them could hold a candle to sweet K.

I love him so much I feel like there are no words for it. I walk around some times feeling smug because I think that no one has ever been as in love as the two of us are. He is my best friend, and my family, and my one true love. I am so so so lucky to have him in my life.

WhoaÖokay. That was a lot of shmoopiness. No one likes that.

Forgive me. Lately loving thoughts are the soundtrack in my mind. Which is a nice break from my usual combination of worry and self doubt.

Reading: More Anastasia books (no, the juvenile fiction phase has not passed)

Craving: A warm bath because once again my office is only fit for a penguin.

Thinking: I am getting married in two and a half weeks!

Student teaching begins - 2005-02-20
Three more days!! - 2005-02-07
Weekend recap - 2005-01-31
Oh the hate - 2005-01-26
Yay for staying home! - 2005-01-24

i carry | your heart

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